Polyamorous elders: aging in open relationships
Gespeichert in:
1. Verfasser: | |
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Format: | Buch |
Sprache: | English |
Veröffentlicht: |
Lanham ; Boulder ; New York ; London
Rowman & Littlefield
[2023]
|
Schriftenreihe: | Diverse sexualities, genders, and relationships
|
Schlagworte: | |
Online-Zugang: | Inhaltsverzeichnis |
Beschreibung: | xxviii, 241 Seiten 229 mm |
ISBN: | 9781538169278 9781538169261 |
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Contents xv Acknowledgments Introduction What Is the Prevalence of Polyamory among Elders? The “Greatest Generation” and the “Baby Boomers” Intersectionality and Poly Elders Studies That Attempt to Fill in the Gaps on Information about Poly Elders Research Methods The Demographics of Case Studies and Examples Presented of Poly Elders xvii xix xx xxii xxiii xxvii xxvii PART I: WHAT CHALLENGES ARE MOST COMMON FOR POLY GEEZERS? 1 First of All, Sexi The Changing Nature of Sex for Poly Geezers Case Study #1: Elise The Challenges of Sex for Poly Geezers Joshua’s Story Ginny’s Story Case Study #2: Danilo Case Study #3: Anastasia Jesses Story Case Study #4: Libby Strategies Developed by Poly Elders to Solve the Sexual Changes of Aging Case Study #5: Jake and Nora Case Study #6: Joseph Case Study #7: Sita Marilyns Story Case Study #8: Lise ix 1 2 2 4 5 5 6 7 9 9 10 11 12 12 13 14 15
x Contents 15 Βώ1 Poly Can Help Couples Navigate Sexual Problems and Find ^η Delightful Solutions Case Study #9; Jordan and Lourdes Case Study #10: Dolly and Jim j 2 Some Poly People Naturally Shift to Monogamy as They Age շշ 22 Case Study # 1 : Ma^ and Gene Case Study #2: Vicky and Bart Case Study #3: Terry and Randy ^ ^ 3 Poly Geezers and Celibacy: Is There a Contradiction? 27 What’s Sex Got to Do with It? Flourishing Poly Relationships, but without the Sexi Case Study #1: Paul, Stacey, and Daniel Case Study #2: Francois, Audrey, and Jeannie Case Study #3: Jerome and Raphael Case Study #4: LaRonda and Beeandra 4 The Curious Phenomenon of Successful Older Poiy֊Mono Couples g 33 Case Study #1 : Rachel, Matt, and Jerry Case Study #2: Lauren and Kumar Case Study #3: Ayisha, Betty, and Roger Case Study #4: Geraldine and Dre Case Study #5: Sharon, Benny, and Pam The Unique Benefits of Poly Relationships for Older Monogamous Women Cautionary Tales on the Challenges of a Mono-Poly Relationship Case Study #6: Shirley Case Study # 7: Hazel A Few Other Older Women’s ‘'Short Takes” on the Benefits of Mono/ Poly Relationships 50 $4 $6 40 42 44 45 46 46 48 5 Elders Trying to Explain Polyamory to Their Adult Kids Case Study #1: Nancy, Emma, and Carrie Case Study #2·. Jon 6 Older People Who Were "Poly before Polyamory Was Invented" 52 52 54 56 Case Study #1: Harry and Hope Case Study #2: Linda, Bruce, and Cliff Case Study #3՛. Danielle and Valentino Case Study #4: Frank, Lisa, and Crystal 7 Conflicts over a Partner's Adult Children and/or Grandchildren Case Study # 1 : Lucy, Reginald,
and Jim Case Study #2: Веку, Stella, and Ginger 56 57 58 59 ¿1 61 62
Concents xi PART II: RETIREMENT AND ITS EFFECTS ON POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIPS 67 8 When One Partner Is Already Retired and Another Partner Eventually Retires 68 Case Study #1: Warren, Jen, and Aja Case Study #2: Karen, Benjamin, and Louellen 68 70 9 When One Partner Retires but One or More Partners Are Still Working 72 Case Study #1: Joe, Martha, Jerry, and Anita Case Study #2: Kelly, Bill, Phil, and Sue 72 73 10 Retirement Can Create More Time and Energy for Poly Relationships, and Poly Geezers Are Pretty Good at Time and Energy Management 77 11 Danny’s Story Poly Geezers Tend to Have Excellent Time and Energy Management Skills Johns Story Case Study #1: Blanche Case Study #2: Tommy, Janet, and Bertha Are Elders Good at Polyamory or Is Polyamory Good for Elders? 77 78 78 79 79 81 Retirement Can Shine a Spotlight on Incompatibilities 82 Ricardo and Maria’s Story Case Study #1: Joanna, Buddy, Harriet, and Tad 83 86 PART III: WHEN POLY ELDERS WANT (OR NEED) TO MOVE INTO SENIOR LIVING FACILITIES 12 Poly Elders Fear Discrimination and Hostility in Senior Housing 89 90 Case Study #1; Joanne, Jay, and Patsy Case Study #2: Pierre and Pharell Case Study #3: Miriam Stan and Martin’s Story Case Study #4: Ellen, Jamie, and Evie 13 What Are the Options for Polys in Senior Living? Sex-Positive Senior Housing: Is That an Oxymoron? Elder Care Professionals’ Perspectives on Poly Elders and Senior Living Facilities Lessons from the Experience of LGBTQ Elders in Senior Living Facilities Case Study #1: Russell, Matilda, and Ray Case Study #2: Evelyn, Lou, and Nikki Senior Cohousing Communities
May Be a Poly-Friendly Senior Housing Option 91 93 94 98 103 106 107 109 110 112 113 115
xii Contents PART IV: POLY GEHERS COPING WITH HEALTH PROBLEMS ,^^ AND DISABILITIES 14 The Effects of Medical Conditions on Poly Elders and Relationships ^θ 118 Case Study #1 : Rhonda, Josh, and Sarona Medical Conditions Complicate the Logistics and Romance of Po y լլց Relationships Katie’s Story Case Study #2: Rajah, Sabre, Rachel, and Dasan Taniki and Katherine’s Story Case Study #3: Miles, Shane, and Art Pauls Story Case Study #4·. Jacinda, Maddy, and Millie 15 Caregiving Responsibilities for Elderly Relatives . 2Q շշ ^ ^ ^ζ “Younger Elders” with Responsibilities for Elderly Parents Case Study #1: Wanda and Amelia Case Study #2: Orit, Aryeh, and Donna Sue Remi’s Story No “One Right Answer” to Caring for Elderly Parents Case Study #3: Keiko, Rich, and Frank Case Study #4; Robbie Strategies and Planning for Successful Caregiving 16 Advantages of Polyamory through Caregiving, Death, and Mourning Kate, Gustav, and Phillips Story 17 Twenty-First-Century Pandemics and Poiy Elders: Lessons from the Age of COVID-19 How Are Poly Elders Coping in the Age of COVID-19? Case Study #1: Lindsey, Jose, and Maris The Impact of Isolation and Loneliness on Poly Elders Due to COVID-19 Case Study #2: Myrna Case Study #3: Mary Jo, Emile, and Hallie Case Study #4: Joan, Juan, and June Marlene and Mary’s Story Case Study #5: Kimberly, Frank, and iris Anita’s Story Case Study #6: Amy Ann, Zekia, and Shelley Internet Dating in the Midst of a Pandemic Blythe’s Story Sumați Sparks’ Pandemic Dating Advice Case Study #7: Rosalinda, Xavier, and Gemina Internet Dating May Morph into Dating in Real Life
Case Study #8: Moira, Guillermo, and Lee ^θ ^33 135 135 136 137 I39 139 142 142 144 144 145 147 148 149 151 152 154 156 Լ57 157 159 160 161
Contents xiii 18 Poly Mutual Aid: Elders' Polycules Come through for Them during the Pandemic 165 Rashida’s Story Case Study #1: Lucille, Duncan, and Kara Poly Elders Find Stronger Support from Their Polycules Case Study #2: Lei Case Study #3: Sarah, Rashi, and Harlan Poly Elders’ Experience with Grief and Loss during the Pandemic Liliana’s Story Parting Words on the COVID-19 Pandemic and Poly Elders 165 168 170 171 173 175 175 177 PARTV: POLYAMORY AND THE DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS OF AGING 179 19 What Are the Developmental Tasks for Poly Elders? 180 Case Study # 1 : Hans and Meg 20 Poly Geezers Creating a New Life "Postcareer and Postkids" 182 185 Case Study #1: Shereen, Ranil, and Denise 21 "Life Review" as a Developmental Task for Poly Geezers 186 190 Case Study #1: Marcus, Gwen, and Lola Cole’s Story Case Study #2: Debbie 22 Poly Elders Accepting the Deaths of Loved Ones, and Their Own Mortality 191 193 195 197 Case Study #1: Geri, Frank, and Angela Case Study #2: Alonzo Case Study #3: Deonte, Linden, Lon, and John Case Study #4: Louise and Natalie Poly Elders’ Unique Experience of the Developmental Tasks of Aging 198 199 200 203 205 23 Legal and Financial Issues for Poly Elders: Estate Planning, Advance Directives, and Other Strategies to Protect Poiy Families 206 Advance Health Care Directives Durable Power of Attorney Wills Estate Planning Advice from Poly-Friendly Attorneys Divorce or the Demise of a Poly Relationship Strategies to Mitigate the High Cost of Care Martas Story Poly Elders Need to Talk about “The Three Ds”: Disability, Death, and Divorce 207 209 209 211 212
214 21? 217
xiv Contents 24 A Few Parting Words and Directions for Further Study 219 Bibliography: Books on Consensual Nonmonogamy, Open Relationships, and Polyamory Compiled by Sonia Song 221 References 225 Index 229 About the Author 241 |
adam_txt |
Contents xv Acknowledgments Introduction What Is the Prevalence of Polyamory among Elders? The “Greatest Generation” and the “Baby Boomers” Intersectionality and Poly Elders Studies That Attempt to Fill in the Gaps on Information about Poly Elders Research Methods The Demographics of Case Studies and Examples Presented of Poly Elders xvii xix xx xxii xxiii xxvii xxvii PART I: WHAT CHALLENGES ARE MOST COMMON FOR POLY GEEZERS? 1 First of All, Sexi The Changing Nature of Sex for Poly Geezers Case Study #1: Elise The Challenges of Sex for Poly Geezers Joshua’s Story Ginny’s Story Case Study #2: Danilo Case Study #3: Anastasia Jesses Story Case Study #4: Libby Strategies Developed by Poly Elders to Solve the Sexual Changes of Aging Case Study #5: Jake and Nora Case Study #6: Joseph Case Study #7: Sita Marilyns Story Case Study #8: Lise ix 1 2 2 4 5 5 6 7 9 9 10 11 12 12 13 14 15
x Contents 15 Βώ1 Poly Can Help Couples Navigate Sexual Problems and Find ^η Delightful Solutions Case Study #9; Jordan and Lourdes Case Study #10: Dolly and Jim j 2 Some Poly People Naturally Shift to Monogamy as They Age շշ 22 Case Study # 1 : Ma^ and Gene Case Study #2: Vicky and Bart Case Study #3: Terry and Randy ^ ^ 3 Poly Geezers and Celibacy: Is There a Contradiction? 27 What’s Sex Got to Do with It? Flourishing Poly Relationships, but without the Sexi Case Study #1: Paul, Stacey, and Daniel Case Study #2: Francois, Audrey, and Jeannie Case Study #3: Jerome and Raphael Case Study #4: LaRonda and Beeandra 4 The Curious Phenomenon of Successful Older Poiy֊Mono Couples g 33 Case Study #1 : Rachel, Matt, and Jerry Case Study #2: Lauren and Kumar Case Study #3: Ayisha, Betty, and Roger Case Study #4: Geraldine and Dre Case Study #5: Sharon, Benny, and Pam The Unique Benefits of Poly Relationships for Older Monogamous Women Cautionary Tales on the Challenges of a Mono-Poly Relationship Case Study #6: Shirley Case Study # 7: Hazel A Few Other Older Women’s ‘'Short Takes” on the Benefits of Mono/ Poly Relationships 50 $4 $6 40 42 44 45 46 46 48 5 Elders Trying to Explain Polyamory to Their Adult Kids Case Study #1: Nancy, Emma, and Carrie Case Study #2·. Jon 6 Older People Who Were "Poly before Polyamory Was Invented" 52 52 54 56 Case Study #1: Harry and Hope Case Study #2: Linda, Bruce, and Cliff Case Study #3՛. Danielle and Valentino Case Study #4: Frank, Lisa, and Crystal 7 Conflicts over a Partner's Adult Children and/or Grandchildren Case Study # 1 : Lucy, Reginald,
and Jim Case Study #2: Веку, Stella, and Ginger 56 57 58 59 ¿1 61 62
Concents xi PART II: RETIREMENT AND ITS EFFECTS ON POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIPS 67 8 When One Partner Is Already Retired and Another Partner Eventually Retires 68 Case Study #1: Warren, Jen, and Aja Case Study #2: Karen, Benjamin, and Louellen 68 70 9 When One Partner Retires but One or More Partners Are Still Working 72 Case Study #1: Joe, Martha, Jerry, and Anita Case Study #2: Kelly, Bill, Phil, and Sue 72 73 10 Retirement Can Create More Time and Energy for Poly Relationships, and Poly Geezers Are Pretty Good at Time and Energy Management 77 11 Danny’s Story Poly Geezers Tend to Have Excellent Time and Energy Management Skills Johns Story Case Study #1: Blanche Case Study #2: Tommy, Janet, and Bertha Are Elders Good at Polyamory or Is Polyamory Good for Elders? 77 78 78 79 79 81 Retirement Can Shine a Spotlight on Incompatibilities 82 Ricardo and Maria’s Story Case Study #1: Joanna, Buddy, Harriet, and Tad 83 86 PART III: WHEN POLY ELDERS WANT (OR NEED) TO MOVE INTO SENIOR LIVING FACILITIES 12 Poly Elders Fear Discrimination and Hostility in Senior Housing 89 90 Case Study #1; Joanne, Jay, and Patsy Case Study #2: Pierre and Pharell Case Study #3: Miriam Stan and Martin’s Story Case Study #4: Ellen, Jamie, and Evie 13 What Are the Options for Polys in Senior Living? Sex-Positive Senior Housing: Is That an Oxymoron? Elder Care Professionals’ Perspectives on Poly Elders and Senior Living Facilities Lessons from the Experience of LGBTQ Elders in Senior Living Facilities Case Study #1: Russell, Matilda, and Ray Case Study #2: Evelyn, Lou, and Nikki Senior Cohousing Communities
May Be a Poly-Friendly Senior Housing Option 91 93 94 98 103 106 107 109 110 112 113 115
xii Contents PART IV: POLY GEHERS COPING WITH HEALTH PROBLEMS ,^^ AND DISABILITIES 14 The Effects of Medical Conditions on Poly Elders and Relationships ^θ 118 Case Study #1 : Rhonda, Josh, and Sarona Medical Conditions Complicate the Logistics and Romance of Po y լլց Relationships Katie’s Story Case Study #2: Rajah, Sabre, Rachel, and Dasan Taniki and Katherine’s Story Case Study #3: Miles, Shane, and Art Pauls Story Case Study #4·. Jacinda, Maddy, and Millie 15 Caregiving Responsibilities for Elderly Relatives . 2Q շշ ^ ^ ^ζ “Younger Elders” with Responsibilities for Elderly Parents Case Study #1: Wanda and Amelia Case Study #2: Orit, Aryeh, and Donna Sue Remi’s Story No “One Right Answer” to Caring for Elderly Parents Case Study #3: Keiko, Rich, and Frank Case Study #4; Robbie Strategies and Planning for Successful Caregiving 16 Advantages of Polyamory through Caregiving, Death, and Mourning Kate, Gustav, and Phillips Story 17 Twenty-First-Century Pandemics and Poiy Elders: Lessons from the Age of COVID-19 How Are Poly Elders Coping in the Age of COVID-19? Case Study #1: Lindsey, Jose, and Maris The Impact of Isolation and Loneliness on Poly Elders Due to COVID-19 Case Study #2: Myrna Case Study #3: Mary Jo, Emile, and Hallie Case Study #4: Joan, Juan, and June Marlene and Mary’s Story Case Study #5: Kimberly, Frank, and iris Anita’s Story Case Study #6: Amy Ann, Zekia, and Shelley Internet Dating in the Midst of a Pandemic Blythe’s Story Sumați Sparks’ Pandemic Dating Advice Case Study #7: Rosalinda, Xavier, and Gemina Internet Dating May Morph into Dating in Real Life
Case Study #8: Moira, Guillermo, and Lee ^θ ^33 135 135 136 137 I39 139 142 142 144 144 145 147 148 149 151 152 154 156 Լ57 157 159 160 161
Contents xiii 18 Poly Mutual Aid: Elders' Polycules Come through for Them during the Pandemic 165 Rashida’s Story Case Study #1: Lucille, Duncan, and Kara Poly Elders Find Stronger Support from Their Polycules Case Study #2: Lei Case Study #3: Sarah, Rashi, and Harlan Poly Elders’ Experience with Grief and Loss during the Pandemic Liliana’s Story Parting Words on the COVID-19 Pandemic and Poly Elders 165 168 170 171 173 175 175 177 PARTV: POLYAMORY AND THE DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS OF AGING 179 19 What Are the Developmental Tasks for Poly Elders? 180 Case Study # 1 : Hans and Meg 20 Poly Geezers Creating a New Life "Postcareer and Postkids" 182 185 Case Study #1: Shereen, Ranil, and Denise 21 "Life Review" as a Developmental Task for Poly Geezers 186 190 Case Study #1: Marcus, Gwen, and Lola Cole’s Story Case Study #2: Debbie 22 Poly Elders Accepting the Deaths of Loved Ones, and Their Own Mortality 191 193 195 197 Case Study #1: Geri, Frank, and Angela Case Study #2: Alonzo Case Study #3: Deonte, Linden, Lon, and John Case Study #4: Louise and Natalie Poly Elders’ Unique Experience of the Developmental Tasks of Aging 198 199 200 203 205 23 Legal and Financial Issues for Poly Elders: Estate Planning, Advance Directives, and Other Strategies to Protect Poiy Families 206 Advance Health Care Directives Durable Power of Attorney Wills Estate Planning Advice from Poly-Friendly Attorneys Divorce or the Demise of a Poly Relationship Strategies to Mitigate the High Cost of Care Martas Story Poly Elders Need to Talk about “The Three Ds”: Disability, Death, and Divorce 207 209 209 211 212
214 21? 217
xiv Contents 24 A Few Parting Words and Directions for Further Study 219 Bibliography: Books on Consensual Nonmonogamy, Open Relationships, and Polyamory Compiled by Sonia Song 221 References 225 Index 229 About the Author 241 |
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series2 | Diverse sexualities, genders, and relationships |
spelling | Labriola, Kathy Verfasser (DE-588)1290434093 aut Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships Lanham ; Boulder ; New York ; London Rowman & Littlefield [2023] © 2023 xxviii, 241 Seiten 229 mm txt rdacontent n rdamedia nc rdacarrier Diverse sexualities, genders, and relationships bicssc / Sexual behaviour bicssc / Gender studies, gender groups bicssc / Age groups: the elderly bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gender Studies bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gerontology Non-monogamous relationships Older people - Social conditions Offene Beziehung (DE-588)7712461-3 gnd rswk-swf Alter (DE-588)4001446-0 gnd rswk-swf Geschlechterforschung (DE-588)4482930-9 gnd rswk-swf Offene Beziehung (DE-588)7712461-3 s Alter (DE-588)4001446-0 s Geschlechterforschung (DE-588)4482930-9 s DE-604 Erscheint auch als Online-Ausgabe 978-1-5381-6928-5 Digitalisierung UB Bamberg - ADAM Catalogue Enrichment application/pdf http://bvbr.bib-bvb.de:8991/F?func=service&doc_library=BVB01&local_base=BVB01&doc_number=033987443&sequence=000001&line_number=0001&func_code=DB_RECORDS&service_type=MEDIA Inhaltsverzeichnis |
spellingShingle | Labriola, Kathy Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships bicssc / Sexual behaviour bicssc / Gender studies, gender groups bicssc / Age groups: the elderly bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gender Studies bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gerontology Non-monogamous relationships Older people - Social conditions Offene Beziehung (DE-588)7712461-3 gnd Alter (DE-588)4001446-0 gnd Geschlechterforschung (DE-588)4482930-9 gnd |
subject_GND | (DE-588)7712461-3 (DE-588)4001446-0 (DE-588)4482930-9 |
title | Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_auth | Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_exact_search | Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_exact_search_txtP | Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_full | Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_fullStr | Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_full_unstemmed | Polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_short | Polyamorous elders |
title_sort | polyamorous elders aging in open relationships |
title_sub | aging in open relationships |
topic | bicssc / Sexual behaviour bicssc / Gender studies, gender groups bicssc / Age groups: the elderly bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gender Studies bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gerontology Non-monogamous relationships Older people - Social conditions Offene Beziehung (DE-588)7712461-3 gnd Alter (DE-588)4001446-0 gnd Geschlechterforschung (DE-588)4482930-9 gnd |
topic_facet | bicssc / Sexual behaviour bicssc / Gender studies, gender groups bicssc / Age groups: the elderly bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gender Studies bisacsh / SOCIAL SCIENCE / Gerontology Non-monogamous relationships Older people - Social conditions Offene Beziehung Alter Geschlechterforschung |
url | http://bvbr.bib-bvb.de:8991/F?func=service&doc_library=BVB01&local_base=BVB01&doc_number=033987443&sequence=000001&line_number=0001&func_code=DB_RECORDS&service_type=MEDIA |
work_keys_str_mv | AT labriolakathy polyamorouseldersaginginopenrelationships |