The Hite report on the family: growing up under patriarchy
The Hite Report on the Family will cause you to rethink your childhood, your relationships, and quite possibly your life. It is a powerful and original analysis of the changing shape of private life, a profoundly optimistic and forward-looking answer to the dangerous nuclear-family-only nostalgia fo...
Gespeichert in:
1. Verfasser: | |
---|---|
Format: | Buch |
Sprache: | English |
Veröffentlicht: |
New York
Grove Press
1995
|
Ausgabe: | 1. Grove Press ed. |
Schlagworte: | |
Online-Zugang: | Inhaltsverzeichnis |
Zusammenfassung: | The Hite Report on the Family will cause you to rethink your childhood, your relationships, and quite possibly your life. It is a powerful and original analysis of the changing shape of private life, a profoundly optimistic and forward-looking answer to the dangerous nuclear-family-only nostalgia for the fifties that pervades the ongoing national debate on family values. Shere Hite has listened carefully to the real stories of real people and has developed a fascinating new framework for understanding growing up, based on first-person data rather than on a preconceived model or status quo. In this book, Hite becomes the first person to give theoretical legitimacy to all of the infinite ways that we live as "families," whether as single parents, as same-sex parents, in traditional family groups, or alone. In The Hite Report on the Family Hite challenges established views, arguing that the family is not collapsing but being democratized. Hite introduces a new theory of male eroticism by investigating why so many men and boys confuse sex and violence; she presents a lively new portrait of girls questioning their own sexual identity; and she confounds assumptions of a female "puberty" necessarily parallel to the male. Her questions are provocative and intimate: Do you know how your parents felt about having you? Did your father or mother look at pornography? At what age were your children closest to you? Do men raised by single mothers enjoy better relationships with women? Has children's respect for their mothers increased with the rise in single and employed mothers? With The Hite Report on the Family Shere Hite lights the way to understanding change in the family as the constructive result of choice - not as a moral crisis, but as a successful evolution toward private democracy. |
Beschreibung: | XXIV, 424 S. |
ISBN: | 0802115705 |
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520 | 3 | |a The Hite Report on the Family will cause you to rethink your childhood, your relationships, and quite possibly your life. It is a powerful and original analysis of the changing shape of private life, a profoundly optimistic and forward-looking answer to the dangerous nuclear-family-only nostalgia for the fifties that pervades the ongoing national debate on family values. Shere Hite has listened carefully to the real stories of real people and has developed a fascinating new framework for understanding growing up, based on first-person data rather than on a preconceived model or status quo. In this book, Hite becomes the first person to give theoretical legitimacy to all of the infinite ways that we live as "families," whether as single parents, as same-sex parents, in traditional family groups, or alone. In The Hite Report on the Family Hite challenges established views, arguing that the family is not collapsing but being democratized. Hite introduces a new theory of male eroticism by investigating why so many men and boys confuse sex and violence; she presents a lively new portrait of girls questioning their own sexual identity; and she confounds assumptions of a female "puberty" necessarily parallel to the male. Her questions are provocative and intimate: Do you know how your parents felt about having you? Did your father or mother look at pornography? At what age were your children closest to you? Do men raised by single mothers enjoy better relationships with women? Has children's respect for their mothers increased with the rise in single and employed mothers? With The Hite Report on the Family Shere Hite lights the way to understanding change in the family as the constructive result of choice - not as a moral crisis, but as a successful evolution toward private democracy. | |
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adam_text | Contents
Notes on Research and Methodology xv
Introduction 1
Part I MEMORIES OF EARLY CHILDHOOD 3
Chapter 1 The Eroticism of the Mother 5
DREAM SEQUENCES OF CHILDHOOD 5
MEMORIES OF THE MOTHER S BREASTS
AGE SIX TWELVE 8
THE ISOLATION OF THE BCDY 14
When You re Too Old To Be Touched
BODY INTIMACY IN FAMILIES 17
The Family Defines Sex for the Child (Forbidden
Adult Child Dialogues)
ARCHETYPES OF THE MOTHER 19
The Mother as the Erotic Centre of the Home
The Taboo Against Women Touching or Being Intimate
MARY THE ICON: CLICHES ABOUT MOTHERS 24
DO PARENTS OWN THE CHILD S BODY? 26
Mothers Talk About Their Sexual Feelings for Their
Children
SENSUALITY, EROTICISM AND SEXUALITY IN
THE FAMILY 30
Chapter 2 Violent Physical Intimacy 32
THE CONSTRUCTION OF SEXUALITY AND
EROTICISM THROUGH SPANKING AND PHYSICAL
PUNISHMENT 32
Love Hate for Parents
PUNISHMENT, DISCIPLINE AND THE DEFINITION
OF LOVE 38
v
CONTENTS
SPANKING AND SADO MASOCHISM 41
The Influence of Spanking and Beating on Fantasies
The Hierarchical Psyche; Spanking and Sexuality
WHAT DOES THIS PHYSICAL ASSAULT MEAN? 45
SEXUAL ABUSE OF GIRLS 49
AFTERWORD 53
Part II GROWING UP FEMALE: WHY NO
DAUGHTERICON? 55
GIRLS FIGHT THE SYSTEM: ALICE ASKS QUESTIONS
OF WONDERLAND 57
How Real Is Reality?
Chapter 3 Girls Secret Sexuality and Identity
Age Five Twelve 59
BEING A TOMBOY 59
Glorious Descriptions of Freedom, Using Their Bodies,
Feeling Able To Do All Things
Girls Ownership of Their Own Bodies
GIRLS FIRST IMAGES OF THEIR SEXUALITY:
MENSTRUATION AND MASTURBATION 66
Girls Early Masturbation Experiences Age Five—Twelve
Secret Pleasures
What Do Mothers Today Teil Their Daughters About
Masturbation?
Do Girls Masturbate Together?
Teenage Girls Acceptance of Masturbation Today
GIRLS FIRST MENSTRUATION AND FAMILY DENIAL 74
The Invisibility of Girls Maturing Bodies
Reproduction Becomes Possible!
What Do Mothers Teil Daughters?
Fathers and Menstruation
Changing Attitudes: A New Mother Daughter Discussion
NOW THERE ARE NEW RULES OF COMPORTMENT:
BE A LADY 83
Be a Good Girl (Restrain Yourself!)
Try to Be More Feminine ...
Smile! (Don t Look Unhappy)
Anger and Independence are Forbidden (A Rebellious Girl is a
Demon Child )
Keep Your Legs Together!
Boys Have More Rights
vi
CONTENTS
Positive Pictures of Femininity
Femininity : An Attack on Women, or a New Definition?
PORNOGRAPHIC AND BEAUTY INDUSTRY IMAGES
OF FEMALE SEXUALITY 91
What Do Girls Think When They First See Pornography?
Who Is Beautiful ? Who Is Sexy ?
SEXUAL LIES IN THE FAMILY 97
The Beginnings of the Double Standard: Good Girls and
Bad Girls
Sexual Identity and the Secretive Family System
Chapter 4 The Split Seif: Girls9 New Sexual Identity
Outside the Family
Age Ten Nineteen 100
DATING AND CRUSHES: FEMALE SEXUALITY
AS FORBIDDEN POWER AND PLEASURE 100
VIRGINITY, HYMENS AND FIRST INTERCOURSE
(COITUS) 102
How Many Girls Have Hymens?
Erotic Emotional Pleasure
CONFUSING DECISIONS GIRLS CANT DISCUSS
WITH THE FAMILY 106
The Right to Sex : How Old Are Girls When They Start
Having Sex?
DO PARENTS TAKE GIRLS MINDS SERIOUSLY? 109
RAPE AND DATE RAPE 111
WHAT DO PARENTS SAY TO GIRLS ABOUT DATING?
NOTHING 114
Living in Two Worlds: Dating and Sex—Parents Attitudes
Masturbation and Fantasies: When You Begin to Think
You re Gay
The New Sexual Meaning of Be a Good Girl
Loneliness
A New Attitüde, Despite Parents
GIRLS AS BEST FRIENDS 130
Betrayal, First Gender Disloyalty and Its Consequences
Sensuality Between Best Friends
Love Affairs Between Best Friends
vii
CONTENTS
Chapter 5 Mothers and Daughters: Lovers and Strangers 137
GIRLS AND THEIR MOTHERS: ADORATION AND
CONTEMPT 137
I HOPE I M NOT LIKE MY MOTHER 139
If I grow up to be like my mother, 1*11 put a gun
to my head
GENDER ROLES: STILL WITH US 142
Mother Blaming
HOW MANY GIRLS ADMIRE THEIR FATHER MORE? 144
How Girls Are Taught to Turn Their Attention to Men
1990 s: Girls New Esteem
Women s New Positive Feelings for Their Mother
Girls Cheer Their Mother s Revolt
WHY DO TEENAGE GIRLS FIGHT WITH THEIR MOTHER? 155
They Took Away My Freedom
Mothers as the Family Police
Hair: The Last Area of Control and Physical Intimacy
Clothes and Make Up ( Don t be sexy, otherwise you re a
tramp . . . )
Clashes Over Sex
Beauty and Age: The Politics of Personal Appearance Between
Mothers and Daughters
Ageism: Mothers and Daughters Reflections
Hidden Eroticism Between Mothers and Daughters
Girls Crushes on Their Mother
SEXIST DISCRIMINATION IN THE FAMILY 170
Girls Guilt (For Not Being The Boy Jesus )
A Bürden and a Joy
ARE MOTHERS ANGRY WITH DAUGHTERS—OR WITH
THE MOTHER ROLE 177
Freedom for Mothers?
THE FUTURE OF MOTHER DAUGHTER
RELATIONSHIPS 179
Chapter 6 Girls and Fathers 180
FRIENDSHIP: THE FUTURE MODEL FOR FATHER
DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIPS 180
LOVE AND LONGING: GIRLS FEELINGS FOR
THEIR FATHER 182
viii
CONTENTS
AFFECTION—AND LATER BETRAYAL?—FROM
THE FATHER 185
THE ARCHETYPE OF THE FATHER 193
WhatKindofLove?
A SPECIAL CLOSENESS WITH FATHERS 196
Icons of Male Love
ANGER AND CONFLICT BETWEEN FATHERS
AND DAUGHTERS 198
Can Girls Criticize Their Father—or Is This Disrespectful ?
Painful and Distant Relationships
SEXUAL POLITICS IN THE PARENTS RELATIONSHIP 202
Gender Inequality and Its Effect on Children
Divided Loyalties: Love as Guilt
Love and Domestic Violence: How Are Children to Reconcile
These?
Changing the Emotional Contract Between Mothers
and Fathers
FATHERS AND SEXUALITY 208
Daughters as Their Father s Girlfriend
COMPLICATED SCENARIOS OF LOVE AND POWER
IN FAMILY TRIANGLES 211
Flirtation with Fathers for Special Treatment
FATHERS OVER REACT 212
Fathers Make Sexual Remarks to Their Teenage Daughters
HOW SHOULD A FATHER DISCUSS SEXUALITY
WITH HIS DAUGHTER? 213
GIRLS DESCRIBE THEIR FATHER S SEXUAL
BEHAVIOUR TOWARDS THEM 215
Sexual Abuse and Molestation
Mothers Face the Sexual Molestation of Their Daughters
A Father s Desire for His Daughter?
INCEST: A STATEMENT TO THE MOTHER 224
How Does the Daughter Feel?
A NEW KIND OF FRIENDSHIP 226
Part HI GROWING UP MALE: THE MYSTERIOUS
MEANING OF THE GAME 229
OEDIPUS REVISITED: THE EMOTIONAL AND
SPIRITUAL CONSTRUCTION OF BOYS IDENTITY 231
Conforming to the Male Icons
ix
CONTENTS
MEN OF MYSTERY: THE ATTRACTION OF SILENCE
AND ALOOFNESS 323
Boys Early Memories of Their Father
FATHERS AND PHYSICAL INTIMACY WITH CHILDREN 325
Fathers Describe Cuddling and Playing with Their Children
Men and Childcare
HOW CLOSE IS TOO CLOSE? 329
You Can t Touch Anymore After a Certain Age
Fear of Homosexuality
Fathers of the Future
FATHERS REMAIN DISTANT THROUGHOUT
CHILDHOOD 334
BOYS FEAR OF THEIR FATHER S ANGER AND
PUNISHMENT 335
Punishment of Boys: Physical Discipline
REVOLT, REVOLUTION OR ACCEPTANCE OF THE
FATHER AS HE IS? 339
Boys Who Have a Close Relationship with Their Father
A Sense of Loss
The New Male Revolution
Part TV DEMOCRATIZATION OF THE FAMILY:
A RENAISSANCE FOR THE WEST 343
A DEMOCRATIC REVOLUTION IN THE FAMILY 345
TOWARDS A NEW THEORY OF THE PSYCHO SEXUAL
DEVELOPMENT OF CHILDREN 347
The Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph
The Psyche of Patriarchy: A New Way of Seeing How We
Grow Up: Results of This Study
HISTORY AND THEORY OF THE FAMILY: PERSONAL
AND POLITICAL 352
An Authoritarian Family Does Not Support a Democratic
Political System
The Political History of the Family
The Family is a Political Institution
The Politics of Female Sexuality in the Family
Isn t the Family a Natural , Biological Institution?
The Family Creates Human Nature
THE RIGHTS OF THE CHILD IN A DEMOCRATIZED
FAMILY 361
Children Need Choices
xii
CONTENTS
Alternative Homes for Children
Thirty three Million Street Children : Where is Their Home?
THE CULT OF THE HOLY FAMILY IN
TWENTIETH CENTURY PSYCHOANALYSIS 364
Why Psychologizing the Family Doesn t Work
DEFINITIONS OF LOVE AND POWER 366
Emotional Categories Created by Patriarchy
Love and Power Between Parents and Children
Does Love Include Sex? The Body?
Inequality Between Mothers and Fathers: Is This Love ?
Love Lost and Making the Wrong Decisions
NEW FAMILIES, BUILDING BRIDGES 371
Single Parent Families
DEMOCRACY OF THE HEART: A NEW POLITICS FOR
THE TWENTY FIRST CENTURY 375
Moving to the Future of Family and Society With a More
Mature View
Hite Research Questionnaire on the Family 377
Appendices 387
Index 413
xiii
|
any_adam_object | 1 |
author | Hite, Shere 1942-2020 |
author_GND | (DE-588)119331942 |
author_facet | Hite, Shere 1942-2020 |
author_role | aut |
author_sort | Hite, Shere 1942-2020 |
author_variant | s h sh |
building | Verbundindex |
bvnumber | BV010429662 |
callnumber-first | H - Social Science |
callnumber-label | HQ518 |
callnumber-raw | HQ518 |
callnumber-search | HQ518 |
callnumber-sort | HQ 3518 |
callnumber-subject | HQ - Family, Marriage, Women |
classification_rvk | MS 1900 MS 1990 MS 2900 |
ctrlnum | (OCoLC)31656098 (DE-599)BVBBV010429662 |
dewey-full | 306.85 |
dewey-hundreds | 300 - Social sciences |
dewey-ones | 306 - Culture and institutions |
dewey-raw | 306.85 |
dewey-search | 306.85 |
dewey-sort | 3306.85 |
dewey-tens | 300 - Social sciences |
discipline | Soziologie |
edition | 1. Grove Press ed. |
format | Book |
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indexdate | 2024-07-09T17:52:24Z |
institution | BVB |
isbn | 0802115705 |
language | English |
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publisher | Grove Press |
record_format | marc |
spelling | Hite, Shere 1942-2020 Verfasser (DE-588)119331942 aut The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy Shere Hite 1. Grove Press ed. New York Grove Press 1995 XXIV, 424 S. txt rdacontent n rdamedia nc rdacarrier The Hite Report on the Family will cause you to rethink your childhood, your relationships, and quite possibly your life. It is a powerful and original analysis of the changing shape of private life, a profoundly optimistic and forward-looking answer to the dangerous nuclear-family-only nostalgia for the fifties that pervades the ongoing national debate on family values. Shere Hite has listened carefully to the real stories of real people and has developed a fascinating new framework for understanding growing up, based on first-person data rather than on a preconceived model or status quo. In this book, Hite becomes the first person to give theoretical legitimacy to all of the infinite ways that we live as "families," whether as single parents, as same-sex parents, in traditional family groups, or alone. In The Hite Report on the Family Hite challenges established views, arguing that the family is not collapsing but being democratized. Hite introduces a new theory of male eroticism by investigating why so many men and boys confuse sex and violence; she presents a lively new portrait of girls questioning their own sexual identity; and she confounds assumptions of a female "puberty" necessarily parallel to the male. Her questions are provocative and intimate: Do you know how your parents felt about having you? Did your father or mother look at pornography? At what age were your children closest to you? Do men raised by single mothers enjoy better relationships with women? Has children's respect for their mothers increased with the rise in single and employed mothers? With The Hite Report on the Family Shere Hite lights the way to understanding change in the family as the constructive result of choice - not as a moral crisis, but as a successful evolution toward private democracy. Padres e hijos Patriarcado Sexo (Psicología) Psychologie Children and sex Families Psychological aspects Family life surveys Parent and child Patriarchy Sex (Psychology) Kind (DE-588)4030550-8 gnd rswk-swf Psychologie (DE-588)4047704-6 gnd rswk-swf Eltern (DE-588)4014516-5 gnd rswk-swf Familie (DE-588)4016397-0 gnd rswk-swf Familie (DE-588)4016397-0 s Psychologie (DE-588)4047704-6 s DE-604 Eltern (DE-588)4014516-5 s Kind (DE-588)4030550-8 s HBZ Datenaustausch application/pdf http://bvbr.bib-bvb.de:8991/F?func=service&doc_library=BVB01&local_base=BVB01&doc_number=006949776&sequence=000002&line_number=0001&func_code=DB_RECORDS&service_type=MEDIA Inhaltsverzeichnis |
spellingShingle | Hite, Shere 1942-2020 The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy Padres e hijos Patriarcado Sexo (Psicología) Psychologie Children and sex Families Psychological aspects Family life surveys Parent and child Patriarchy Sex (Psychology) Kind (DE-588)4030550-8 gnd Psychologie (DE-588)4047704-6 gnd Eltern (DE-588)4014516-5 gnd Familie (DE-588)4016397-0 gnd |
subject_GND | (DE-588)4030550-8 (DE-588)4047704-6 (DE-588)4014516-5 (DE-588)4016397-0 |
title | The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy |
title_auth | The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy |
title_exact_search | The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy |
title_full | The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy Shere Hite |
title_fullStr | The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy Shere Hite |
title_full_unstemmed | The Hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy Shere Hite |
title_short | The Hite report on the family |
title_sort | the hite report on the family growing up under patriarchy |
title_sub | growing up under patriarchy |
topic | Padres e hijos Patriarcado Sexo (Psicología) Psychologie Children and sex Families Psychological aspects Family life surveys Parent and child Patriarchy Sex (Psychology) Kind (DE-588)4030550-8 gnd Psychologie (DE-588)4047704-6 gnd Eltern (DE-588)4014516-5 gnd Familie (DE-588)4016397-0 gnd |
topic_facet | Padres e hijos Patriarcado Sexo (Psicología) Psychologie Children and sex Families Psychological aspects Family life surveys Parent and child Patriarchy Sex (Psychology) Kind Eltern Familie |
url | http://bvbr.bib-bvb.de:8991/F?func=service&doc_library=BVB01&local_base=BVB01&doc_number=006949776&sequence=000002&line_number=0001&func_code=DB_RECORDS&service_type=MEDIA |
work_keys_str_mv | AT hiteshere thehitereportonthefamilygrowingupunderpatriarchy |